Let Go of Control for Inner Peace by Deborah Deras

How to Let Go Of Control for Inner Peace
by Deborah Deras, Copyright, 2011

Letting Go is a state of Being rather than Doing. And since we are Human Beings we can practice success with ease and grace by releasing control. When we Control a situation or circumstance we become frustrated, anxious and upset because the time line in which things are transpiring are not what we have in mind. We become impatient, irritable and may even sabotage our success by acting impulsively.
Why? Because, we want what we want when we want it. And quite frankly we are used to getting things we want. We are very competent and capable and know how to get things done. We are great Human DOings!!! But this one area of our life: Career, Relationship, Body seems to be taking longer than expected.

The more we squeeze the vice grip of control, manipulate and conspire to force the square peg into the round whole the more we feel the resistance and push back. So, we try another angle and still nothing. Then finally in sheer frustration we decide to stop trying. If our way is not working then maybe this Job opportunity, Relationship, or Body weight is not for us. But, we really WANT it, really, really bad. So, we take back control and then again like the definition of insanity we do the same thing and get the same pathetic results.

So, again we release but this time for REAL. We truly accept that our life is great even without this thing, person, circumstance and focus on the gratitude for our blessings and then BAM it happens. Suddenly, as if the earth parted the seas we see progress, a light at the end of the tunnel shining brightly magnetically pulling us to our true heart’s desire.

But this is weird, there is no effort here it is just flowing. We are suddenly in the right place at the right time to receive that phone call, meet that person or have that opportunity. Is it fate, luck, destiny? I believe it is the manifestation of our intention that can only come to fruition when we let go of control and trust the universe will bring it to us in perfect time. This is where we find peace in the relinquishment of struggle and allowing our success to unfold in its perfect time with ease and grace.

FIVE R’s To Let Go of Control

1) Release - your vice grip on goal/intention but trust and know it will come to you in perfect time.

2) Relax - with the pushing, forcing and making things happen and know everything that is for you will unfold with ease and grace. If what you think you want doesn’t come it is because there is something even better.

3) Renew your mind by clearing it - Stop thinking about the problem and why things are not happening at the speed you like. Whatever it takes to clear your mind do it: Breathe in: Trust, Breath out: Faith. Repeat until you feel serene.

4) Rejuvenate- Take an Epsom salt lavender bath to clear any negative energy that you may have built up worrying or perseverating about the problem. Bask in the believe that your higher power is taking care of it.

5) Rejoice: Be grateful for all the many blessings in your life now. You can only create fertile soilin your garden of manifestation with an attitude of gratitude.

To your success with ease and grace,

Deborah Deras, M.S., C.R.C., ALSP

To book Deborah for a speaking engagement or coaching session contact,
Synergy Unlimited, LLC

Office: 310-945-5651
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Remember, with the power of Synergy anything is possible. - Odunton and Deras

Power of Surrender

NEARLY GOING POSTAL CONFESSION: The Power of Surrender

Can I confide in you? After a long week of multiple speaking engagements and wet, unseasonably, stormy weather in Los Angeles, I was a bit tired and my patience threshold was running lower than its already low set point. I was on line waiting to get a package at the post office and I felt my eye begin to burn. I had signed the certified mail receipt for this package over a week ago for this airline ticket for a trip that I was supposed to take the following morning.

I had a very busy day planned with only a few hours to pack and get ready before I was off to emcee an all day event. I felt the clock ticking as I waited in line. And this recovering adrenaline addict was on the edge of falling off the wagon. After 45 minutes I got to the front of the line and they instructed me to go to the neighboring post office to see if it was there.

I could not imagine why the postal person did not just put it in my mailbox as I requested. It had been a week and here I was waiting in the cold at a postal center down the street and I had to get downtown for this event and still needed to pack. The more I worried about what I did not want to happen the more powerless I felt. Every moment, I impatiently waited I could feel the constriction of my blood vessels resulting in a very severe migraine. I literally could not see out of my right eye and thank goodness the Venice post office was only a block from my house. My world had literally gotten smaller in this seemingly powerless situation.

Even in my pain, I knew I had to take some form of contrary action. I sent a text to a couple of my prayer partners to pray the plane ticket would come in. I called a couple of friends for support and then realized I was in no condition to drive much less Emcee this conference. I had to surrender and call and get a replacement. This was something that never happens to me so I was shocked and surprised by the rapid rate my body was shutting down. But I know as an adrenaline addict in recovery that my body will no longer allow even a little abuse without rebelling very loudly. I had to let go and let my body recover.

“Surrender allows us to be receptive. It is an act of courage and strength.” – Odunton and Deras, Confessions of an Adrenaline Addict

When faced wtih a challenge or crisis we have two choices:

1) We can beat ourselves up and live in a place or regret and remorse

2) We can take ourselves out of the problem by stepping back and getting fresh air, taking a breath or calling a supportive friend. Than we can ask what are the learnings from the situation?

These insights on the learnings will alow us to make better choices that will empower us in the future and save our adrenal glands from the havoc stressing out can cause us.

How to Avoid Overwhelm

The good news about all my challenges are insights and learning I can share with you so you avoid making the same mistakes.

I realized that I had overscheduled my calendar. Even though I often book events in the future and don’t always know if I will have back to back events. I need to ask myself these questions before saying YES or scheduling anything in my calendar to be sure that my energy is focused on my true priorities.

1) What are my priorities right now?

2) Is saying YES to this event/activity in alignment with my priorities?

3) Is my participation in this activity the highest and best use of my energy?

4) Is there another way I can achieve the same result without actually having to utilize my energy (our most precious resource)?

5) Can I SYNERGIZE or partner up with someone else to achieve the same result?

6) Can I delegate this to someone else for a win-win for all parties?

7) In the big scheme of things is my “not” participating going to have a severe impact on my life purpose?

After answering these questions and perhaps asking your own, there will be clarity of what to invest your precious time and energy in and what you may need to let go of.

This is what I know if we create a life that is balanced all of our goals and successes will come to fruition in its divine time.

If we force things faster than they are supposed to come by attempting to do more than we should than the universe will find away to slow us down by an unexpected delay, illness or other seeming inconvenience. These soul lessons will repeat over and over again until we learn to take care of ourselves and some of us may choose not to take care of our health and live with those consequences.

I am committed to taking my life challenge which is also my life teaching to share my lessons so you don’t have to make the same mistakes and achieve success with ease and grace.

This situation actually inspired me to write my second book which is completely about Surrendering and Letting Go to allow Divine Order. I wrote a draft on the plane and will be bringing it to a bookstore near you very soon.

To our success with ease and grace,


Deborah Deras, M.S., C.R.C., ALSP
International Speaker, Author, Life Coach, Spiritual Counselor

Office: 310-945-5651
Cell: 310-598-0745
Email: deb@synergyunlimited.net
www.synergyunlimited.net

Layoff to Payoff

Are you worried about a potential lay off?

Have you been laid off and are wondering what to do next?


Are you in business but unsure of where to go because of the shift in the economy?

As many of you are aware of, last March, I decided to bite the bullet and go back to working a 9 to 5 gig in addition to running my business. I had recently gone through a divorce and there were quite a few financial obligations I was newly responsible for. The perfect opportunity presented itself working for a company that I respect and for a man I really admire as a mentor. He is able to help at risk individuals find jobs and run a successful rapidly growing non-profit.

My role in the company was to help college students obtain internships in the new emerging Green Collar economy. How cool is that? I love counseling and marketing and I am such a big fan of the Van Jones, Green Jobs for All movement. How perfect is this match up? Plus, I had personal days and vacation days available so I could continue to pursue my speaking gigs and motivate the masses around the world.

For the past year, my amazing Green Team and I worked diligently and placed over 1,098 students in lucrative internships and part-time employment. We were so successful that many of the campuses began to take notice and articles were written in newspapers about us and our presence was recognized on the campus for the first time since the programs' inception years ago and the momentum was finally getting started.

Unfortunately, a few weeks ago, we were informed that our Green Internship program would be cut two years early due to unforeseen circumstances beyond our control. WOW! It felt to me like a hard blow below the belt. Our program was so successful and we exceeded all of our goals and yet all of our hard work would result in an early termination.

This is when my work and practice as a spiritual counselor had to kick in so I would go to faith rather than fear. I know that every thought is energy and that what goes out, comes back in, as its exact equivalent, I decided to think more positively. Author Thomas Troward once said, “Any anxious thought as to the means to be employed in the accomplishment of our purposes is quite unnecessary. If the end is already secured, then it follows that all the steps leading to it are secured also”. It is our responsibility in each moment to choose what thoughts we want to give attention to.

We have to decide what thoughts are worthy and supporting of our energy and focus on those. I quickly shifted my thoughts of lack and fear and realized, that no one entity, organization or institution is my source and supply. I know that abundance is my natural state of being and as long as I am receptive to that, it will be magnetically attracted to me despite any economic conditions. Look at how many companies prospered in the Great Depression. If you don’t believe me read the book, "Think and Grow Rich" by Napoleon Hill. Mr. Hill breaks it down clearly and succinctly.

As I began to talk myself into a better emotional state through affirmations, affirmative prayer and surrendering to what I could not control, I found my peace to be restored and I began to take inspired action or InspirAction. This was a big difference from acting out of fear, worry, doubt, anger or resentment. This was coming from a high vibration energetic state that instantly began to attract opportunities to me.

Suddenly, seemingly out of the blue, a non-profit organization that I had been doing workshops for in the past called me up and informed me that they had several agencies that wanted me to resume workshops. Then, another training company that I had worked with in the past informed me that they have upcoming contracts for me. The University that I taught at, which had not given me classes for awhile suddenly had two classes for me to teach and I began having to turn work down. Opportunities kept pouring in! A speaking gig came in out nowhere and paid me a huge lump sum in advance.

I got money back from taxes. A partner agency informed me of a 1.7 million dollar grant they wanted to partner with our non-profit organization. I could go on and on and tell you all of the financial opportunities that flooded my phone, email and bank account, as I became receptive to the infinite source as my supply rather than the limited source of a “job”. My fear of a layoff shifted me into a faithful, Inspired Action that facilitated a huge payoff that keeps on paying.

Shift Happens: Change your inner world and your outer world will change

was forcing myself to diligently blog even though I really don't enjoy writing that much. Than I realized people don't enjoy reading that much. We are in a high tech digital world. So, I decided to join the 21st Century and bought a handy dandy flip camera and tripod and now I am a VLOGGER. Yes, VLOG (Video Logger). This way you can get to know my personality and get the message without worrying about my bad grammar and careless typos. Be aware I do not know how to edit yet and I am not a cinematographer so the videos are certaintly amateur but the comments I have received on Facebook have been all positive.This VLOG is on how when I Shifted my perception about my life that I had an instant demonstration of my whole world turning sideways. It is so super amazing and cool. You have to see it to believe it. Check it out.

To see the VLOG video go to http://www.passionatelivingnow.com/ and click on videos. If you subscribe to the RSS feed you will be automatically notified when I post a video (theoretically) that is I am still learning how that works. If you become my friend on Facebook you will definately be notified my name is Deborah Cujino-Deras. Enjoy the video and email me your comments and realizations to deb@passionatelivingnow.com.
Deborah Deras, M.S., C.R.C., ALSP
Speaker, Coach and Author
310-945-5651

Join My Law of Attraction Manifestation Meet Up group

One of the things I created to fulfill my mission to spread the word about the Law of Attraction is to create a Meet Up group. It is an online site based on common interests. We do meet up in person however now that our group grew to 400 we will also be having conference calls to share information on the Law of Attraction. Check it out.

Click here to check out
The Law of Attraction: Manifestation Group!

I hope you join our meet up.

Deborah Deras, Speaker, Author and Life Coach
For a complimentary coaching session call 310-945-5651
or go to www.passionatelivingnow.com

How Practicing the Law of Attraction Changed My Life

I began practicing the Law of Attraction in 1999, when I began attending the Agape Spiritual Center in Culver City under the mentorship of the founder, Reverend Michael Beckwith as seen in the movie, The Secret. Even attending my first service, was divinely guided. After being raised Jewish I would have thought a new thought ancient wisdom transdenominational spiritual center of truth could help me in practical ways in my every day life. http://www.agapelive.com

Through attending services on Wednesday and Sunday, taking classes and beginning the practice my life began to change. First my relationships with friends expanded, than I was able to buy my dream home, than I was able to leave my dead end job to start my own home based business, and connect with my soulmate. The best part is I learned how to create this with ease and grace.

After manifesting all the physical things I began to focus more on the qualities of being like joy, peace and love that I wanted in my life. I created an entire business called Passionate Living NOW around sharing my learnings with others which I do in my life coaching, books and speaking. I learned to create a "blissipline" as Dr. Beckwith refers to it instead of scheduling time for prayer, meditation and being of service in my life. I am intending for my life to be about being in a state of service where I release and let go of attachment each day just answering the call to be used to be of the highest service to the world. This is the last step of the Law of Attraction to surrender. The first is focus on what you want, second spend time focusing on it and than let it go. Surrender is not giving up but releasing the need to have it out of desperation. It is knowing as you have asked for it it is already done so need to worry, plead or panic just allow what is to be. For books on the Law of Attraction go to my website and click on resources: http://www.passionatelivingnow.com

I will share with you more tips in my next entry. That's all for now.

To your success with ease and grace,

Deborah Deras, M.S., C.R.C.
Speaker, Life Coach, Author of Confessions of an Adrenaline Addict: How to achieve more with less effort www.adrenalineaddictbook.com
For a complimentary coaching session call 310-945-5651
or go to www.passionatelivingnow.com
to see me speaking live go to: www.synergyunlimited.net